A humorous look at Fife through the eyes of John Watt with verses 3 and 4 herewith by Davey Stewart.
The tune is a variant of the Strathspey ‘The Smith’s a Gallant Fireman’ by James Scott Skinner.
The New Tay Road Bridge, finest in the country
Half a croon tae cross it and it disnae raise a cheer
It’s a bob tae cross the Mersey, ye can stuff it up yer jersey
Would they pay it down in London, oh no bloody fear.
Chorus:
Oh Fife’s got everything, just the place for tourists
See the bonny pit bings staundin in a raw.
Fife’s entertainment, finest in the country
We’re the boys tae come tae if ye want tae get some tips
There’s fitba at Central Park, neckin burdies in the dark
Haggis suppers, hot pies, bingo and chips.
Fife’s Scotch Whisky, finest in the country
Distilled frae mountain water at the Coaltown of Markinch
Man it’s got such power, matured for half an hour
So don’t be vague and ask for --- it’s whisky at a pinch.
Fife Coast beaches, finest in the country
If ye like sewage, floatin roond yer toes
The Costa the East Neuk, its enough tae mak ye bloody puke
If ye want tae go in for a dook, ye hae tae haud yer nose.
Noo Fife’s got culture, finest in the country
Oh when it comes tae arty talk, oh we’re no the mugs
We’ve got Chink nags on oor wa’s, a wheen o gonks in oor ha’s
Vernon Ward, Tretchikof and white wally dugs.
The Rosyth Dockyard, finest in the country
If ye want a cushy job just working for the State
There’s auld folks, blind folks, holiday inclined folks
And if ye want a submarine just hurl it oot the gate.
A recoring of the song appears on the album Shores of the Forth:
[Springthyme SPRCD 1002]
c p 2010 Springthyme Records • Springthyme Music
www.springthyme.co.uk